Saturday, February 11, 2017

Within Her

Sitting at the park remembering that night. Wondering if that midwife thinks about Aminah as much as I do. My thoughts are always on overload, knowing that I could have did something different that night. The midwife could have did something different.
Twin Akliah and Daddy

As I watch twin Aminah play on the Merry-Go-Round with her siblings, I can't help but to feel sad because she is missing her other half. She knows she is a twin but she doesn't know the feeling of what it's like to truly be a twin. I feel she was robbed. We were robbed.
Twin Akilah with face paint

Twin Akilah

The mother in me just will not give up on Aminah even though her flesh is gone. When I first lost Aminah a part of me wanted to hide because I was ashamed of my choices. A part of me was furious, my rage was real and strong.

I felt like the MMA (Missouri. Midwife .Association) failed me. I felt like NARM (North American Registry of Midwives) failed me. My lawyer failed me. Most of all the Midwife failed me.

When looking at the pictures just know this is the same flesh that didnt get a chance. I am blessed to have her. Within her I see Aminah.

The Midwife From Hell

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